I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
