Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I didn't notice because vodka
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
