I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
