So drunk, too bad you don't want this
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
