there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
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