So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
