so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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