I wanna bring you to show and tell
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
