This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Randomize