My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
im drinking this country out of the recession.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
