Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I skipped work to stalk him.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
