fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
