Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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