You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
