the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
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