We're facebook friends in real life
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
