babies were throwing up all over the place
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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