I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
