Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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