Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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