New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
