we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
