Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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