Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
