I'm drive I can fine osifer
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
