No awkward lesbian experiences without me
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize