you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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