i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
We need to get me chipped asap
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Shame - the story of my life.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
