Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
