I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize