I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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