Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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