Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
