You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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