I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
