he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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