Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i woke up with toilet paper straight tucked up in my underwear wearing a pizza sauce mustach. I dont think i got laid last night.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
