Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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