Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
