what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
