Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I can't trust your balls anymore.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
