Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
