he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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