Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
