Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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