I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
