It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Randomize
