he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
