Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
