I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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