I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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